千万不要忘记，对面那个正在与你交谈的人，对于他自身的需求，以及自身问题的关注程度，远比对你的兴趣高一百倍。一个人对脖子上一颗小痣的关注程度，要远远超过对非洲四十次地震的关注。下次你跟别人谈话的时候想想这个，做一个好的聆听者。激励对方多谈论自己。
很多时候，我们并不需要多少语言为我们排解，只是需要一个聆听者。我们的朋友也是如此。
expand [ik'sp鎛d] v. 扩张；详述
You' ll have to expand your argument if you want to convince me.
你如果想使我信服，就必须详述你的论点。
botanist ['btnist] n. 植物学家
She was a botanist.
她是一个植物学家。
courtesy ['k:tisi] n. 礼貌；好意
They showed us great courtesy.
他们对我们很有礼貌。
anatomy ['n鎡mi] n. 解剖学；剖析
Can you tell me where the anatomy lab is?
能不能告诉我解剖实验室在哪儿？
专注地倾听他人讲话，就是对他人最好的尊敬。
如果你想成为一个健谈者，那么就要做一个善于倾听的人。
下次你跟别人谈话的时候想想这个，做一个好的聆听者。
But I never got there except for a twenty-four-hour stay once in Algiers.
except for：除了……以外；要不是由于
The botanist then turned to our host and paid me several flattering compliments.
turn to：转向；求助于
41多一小时的清醒
How to Add One Hour a Day to your Waking Life
戴尔·卡耐基 / Dale Carnegie
Why am I writing a chapter on preventing fatigue in a book on preventing worry? That is simple: because fatigue often produces worry, or, at least, it makes you susceptible to worry. Any medical student will tell you that fatigue lowers physical resistance to the common cold and hundreds of other diseases and any psychiatrist will tell you that fatigue also lowers your resistance to the emotions of fear and worry. So preventing fatigue tends to prevent worry.
Did I say "tends to prevent worry" ? That is putting it mildly. Dr. Edmund Jacobson goes much further. Dr. Jacob son has written two books on relaxation: Progressive Relaxation and You Must Relax, and as director of the University of Chicago Laboratory for Clinical Physiology, he has spent years conducting investigations in using relaxation as a method in medical practice. He declares that any nervous or emotional state "fails to exist in the presence of complete relaxation." That is another way of saying: You cannot continue to worry if you relax.
So, to prevent fatigue and worry, the first rule is: Rest often. Rest before you get tired.
Why is that so important? Because fatigue accumulate with astonishing rapidity. The United States Army has discovered by repeated tests that even young men—men toughened by years of Army training—can march better, and hold up longer, if they throw down their packs and rest ten minutes out of every hour. So the Army forces them to do just that.
Your heart is just as smart as the U. S. Army. Your heart pumps enough blood through your body every day to fill a railway tank car. It exerts enough energy every twenty-four hours to shovel twenty tons of coal on to a platform three feet high. It does this incredible amount of work for fifty, seventy, or maybe ninety years. How can it stand it? Dr. Walter B. Cannon, of the Harvard Medical School, explains it. He says: "Most people have the idea that the heart is working all the time. As a matter of fact, there is a definite rest period after each contraction. When beating at a moderate rate of seventy pulses per minute, the heart is actually working only nine hours out of the twenty-four. In the aggregate its rest periods total a full fifteen hours per day."
A physical worker can do more work if he takes more time out for rest. Frederick Taylor demonstrated that while working as a scientific management engineer with the Bethlehem Steel Company. He observed that labouring men were loading approximately 12 1／2 tons of pig-iron per man each day on freight cars and that they were exhausted at noon. He made a scientific study of all the fatigue factors involved,and declared that these men should be loading not 12 1／2 tons of pig-iron per day, but forty-seven tons per day! He figured that they ought to do almost four times as much as they were doing, and not be exhausted. But prove it!
Taylor selected a Mr. Schmidt who was required to work by the stop-watch. Schmidt was told by the man who stood over him with a watch："Now pick up a 'pig' and walk... now sit down and rest... now walk... now rest."
What happened? Schmidt carried forty-seven tons of pig-iron each day while the other men carried only 12.5 tons per man. And he practically never failed to work at this pace during the three years that Frederick Taylor was at Bethlehem. Schmidt was able to do this because he rested before he got tired. He worked approximately 26 minutes out of the hour and rested 34 minutes. He rested more than he worked—yet he did almost four times as much work as the others!Is this mere hearsay? No, you can read the record yourself in Principles of Scientific Management by Frederick Winslow Taylor.
Let me repeat: do what the Army does—take frequent rests. Do what your heart does—rest before you get tired, and you will add one hour a day to your waking life
我为什么要在一本谈论排忧的书里写有关避免疲劳的问题呢？原因很简单，因为疲劳常常会带来烦恼，至少会使你容易感到烦恼。任何一个医科学生都会告诉你，疲劳会降低身体对普通感冒和其他上百种疾病的抵抗力。任何一位心理学家都会告诉你，疲劳会降低你对恐惧和烦闷的抵抗力。所以，避免疲劳有助于避免忧虑。
我刚才是说“可以避免忧虑”吗？这句话表达得缺少力度。芝加哥大学实验心理学实验室主任埃德蒙·雅各布解释得更明确一些。他写了两本有关放松的书——《消除紧张情绪》和《放松紧张情绪》。多年来，他一直在临床实践中运用放松紧张情绪的方法，并进行了相关方面的研究。他声称，任何精神或是情绪的紧张状态“在完全放松的状态下就会消失”。换句话说，如果你处于放松状态，就不会再忧虑了。
所以，为了避免疲劳和忧虑，第一条规则就是：经常休息，在你感到疲倦之前休息。
这一条为什么很重要呢？因为疲劳的累积速度快得惊人。美国陆军经过反复试验得出：受过多年军事训练的年轻人，如果他们丢下包，每小时休息10分钟的话，他的行军速度会很快，并能持续很长时间。所以，陆军部队强制他们要这样做。
你的心脏与美国陆军士兵的心脏一样健康。心脏每天为你身体提供的血液，你的心脏24小时内所提供的能量足以把20吨煤铲到3英尺高的月台上。心脏承受如此大的工作量，要持续五十、七十甚至九十年，心脏是如何承受的呢？哈佛医院的华特·坎农博士解释说：“大多数人都认为心脏是在一直不停地工作。事实上，心脏每收缩一次，都会停止一段时间。在以每分钟70次的速度跳动时，24小时中，心脏的实际工作时间仅有9小时，每天的休息时间总计长达15小时。”
体力劳动者如果每天有足够的时间休息，那么，他就可以干更多的活。弗雷德里克·泰勒在伯利恒钢铁公司担任科学管理工程师期间，通过观察发现：每个工人每天往货车上搬运12.5吨生铁，到了中午，他就筋疲力尽了。弗雷德里克·泰勒对导致工人疲劳的因素作了一次科学研究。他认为，这些工人每天不应只装运12.5吨生铁，而是47吨。他认为，工人们应该创造的工作量至少是现在的四倍。不过，我们要证明一下。
泰勒挑选了施密特先生，要求他按秒表的时间工作。施密特让一个人拿着表站在他身边：“现在开始搬运生铁，走……现在坐下来，休息一会儿……现在走……现在休息。”
