Resentment caused by a brash order may last a long time—even if the order was given to correct an obviously bad situation.Dan Santarelli，a teacher at a vocational school in Wyoming，Pennsylvania，told one of our classes how one of his students hadblocked the entrance way to one of the school’s shops by illegally parking his car in it.One of the other instructors stormed into the classroom and asked in an arrogant tone，“Whose car is blocking the driveway？”When the student who owned the car responded，the instructor screamed：“Move that car and move it right now，or I’ll wrap a chain around it and drag it out of there.”
Now that student was wrong.The car should not have been parked there.But from that day on，not only did that student resent the instructor’s action，but all the students in the class did everything they could to give the instructor a hard time and make his job unpleasant.
How could he have handled it differently？If he had asked in a friendly way，“Whose car is in the driveway？”and then suggested that if it were moved，other cars could get in and out，the student would have gladly moved it and neither he nor his classmates would have been upset and resentful.
Asking questions not only makes an order more palatable；it often stimulates the creativity of the persons whom you ask.People are more likely to accept an order if they have had a part in the decision that caused the order to be issued.
When Ian Macdonald of Johannesburg，South Africa，the general manager of a small manufacturing plant specializing in precision machine parts，had the opportunity to accept a very large order，he was convinced that he would not meet the promised delivery date.The work already scheduled in the shop and the short completion time needed for this order made it seem impossible for him to accept the order.
Instead of pushing his people to accelerate their work and rush the order through，he called everybody together，explained the situation to them，and told them how much it would mean to the company and to them if they could make it possible toproduce the order on time.Then he started asking questions：“Is there anything we can do to handle this order？”
“Can anyone think of different ways to process it through the shop that will make it possible to take the order？”
“Is there any way to adjust our hours or personnel assignments that would help？”
The employees came up with many ideas and insisted that he take the order.They approached it with a “We can do it”attitude，and the order was accepted，produced and delivered on time.
An effective leader will use...
PRINCIPLE 4：
Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
Chapter 26
Let the Other Person Save Face
Years ago the General Electric Company was faced with the delicate task of removing Charles Steinmetz from the head of a department.Steinmetz，a genius of the first magnitude when it came to electricity，was a failure as the head of the calculating department.Yet the company didn’t dare offend the man.He was indispensable—and highly sensitive.So they gave him a new title.They made him Consulting Engineer of the General Electric Company—a new title for work he was already doing—and let someone else head up the department.
Steinmetz was happy.
So were the officers of G.E.They had gently maneuvered their most temperamental star，and they had done it without a storm—by letting him save face.
Letting one save face！How important，how vitally important that is！And how few of us ever stop to think of it！We ride roughshod over the feelings of others，getting our own way，finding fault，issuing threats，criticizing a child or an employee in front of others，without even considering the hurt to the other person’s pride.Whereas a few minutes’thought，a considerate word or two，a genuine understanding of the other person’s attitude，would go so far toward alleviating the sting！
Let’s remember that the next time we are faced with the distasteful necessity of discharging or reprimanding an employee.“Firing employees is not much fun.Getting fired is even less fun.”（I’m quoting now from a letter written me by Marshall A.
Granger，a certified public accountant.）“Our business is mostly seasonal.Therefore we have to let a lot of people go after the income tax rush is over.It’s a byword in our profession that no one enjoys wielding the ax.Consequently，the custom has developed of getting it over as soon as possible，and usually in the following way：‘sit down，Mr.Smith.The season’s over，and we don’t seem to see any more assignments for you.Of course，you understood you were only employed for the busy season anyhow，etc.，etc.’
“The effect on these people is one of disappointment and a feeling of being ‘let down.’Most of them are in the accounting field for life，and they retain no particular love for the firm that drops them so casually.
“I recently decided to let our seasonal personnel go with a little more tact and consideration.So I call each one in only after carefully thinking over his or her work during the winter.And I’ve said something like this：‘Mr.Smith，you’ve done a fine job （if he has）.That time we sent you to Newark，you had a tough assignment.You were on the spot，but you came through with flying colors，and we want you to know the firm is proud of you.You’ve got the stuff—you’re going a long way，wherever you’re working.This firm believes in you，and is rooting for you，and we don’t want you to forget it.’
“Effect？The people go away feeling a lot better about being fired.They don’t feel ‘let down.’They know if we had work for them，we’d keep them on.And when we need them again，they come to us with a keen personal affection.”
At one session of our course，two class members discussed the negative effects of faultfinding versus the positive effects of letting the other person save face.
Fred Clark of Harrisburg，Pennsylvania，told of an incident that occurred in his company：
