Luckily, there is a way to be happy. It involves changing the emphasis of our thinking from what we want to what we have. Rather than wishing your spouse was different, try thinking about her wonderful qualities. Instead of complaining about your salary, be grateful that you have a job. Rather than wishing you were able to take a vacation to Hawaii, think of how much fun you have had close to home. The list of possibilities is endless! Each time you notice yourself falling into the "I wish life were different" trap, back off and start over. Take a breath and remember all that you have to be grateful. When you focus not on what you want, but on what you have, you end up getting more of what you want anyway. If you focus on the good qualities of your spouse, she' ll be more loving. If you are grateful for your job rather than complaining about it, you' ll do a better job, be more productive, and probably end up getting a raise anyway. If you focus on ways to enjoy yourself around home rather than waiting to enjoy yourself in Hawaii, you' ll end up having more fun. If you ever do get to Hawaii, you' ll be in the habit of enjoying yourself. And, if by some chance you don' t, you' ll have a great life anyway.
Make a note to yourself to start thinking more about what you have than what you want. If you do, your life will start appearing much better than before. For perhaps the first time in your life, you' ll know what it means to feel satisfied.
专注于我们想得到的，而不是我们所拥有的，这是我见过的一种最具普遍性和破坏性的心理趋向。我们拥有多少，似乎并无太大区别，我们欲望的清单不断扩充，因而我们永远得不到满足。“当我实现了这个愿望，就会快乐”。一旦这个欲望得到满足，以后还会出现相同的欲求心理。
我们想要这个或那个。如果得不到，就会不断地去想那些没有的东西，总是感到不满足。如果得到了，在新的条件下，我们又会产生同样的心理。所以，尽管我们得到了，可还是不开心。如果我们一味地渴求新的欲望，将无法找到幸福。
幸运的是，有一种能让我们获得幸福的方法：转换我们思考的重心，从想要的转移到拥有的。我们可以试着去想伴侣的可贵品质，而不去希求她该如何与现在不同；可以为自己拥有一份工作充满感激，而不去抱怨薪水太低；可以设想闭门在家的种种乐趣，而不是渴望去夏威夷度假。可以这样去考虑事物！一旦你意识到自己又陷入这个思维陷阱“我希望生活不是这样”时，要退后一步，重新思考，深呼吸，想想你所拥有的。这样，感激之情便会油然而生。当你关注的不再是自己想要的，而是所拥有的时，你最终得到的一定会比想要的更多；如果你关注伴侣的优秀品德，她就会更可爱；如果你对工作充满感激，而不是抱怨，你会做得更好，工作效率会更高，薪水也可能会提高；如果你在家能自得其乐，而不是等着去夏威夷享受，你会找到更多的乐趣。假设你真的去了夏威夷，往往会更快乐，即使因为某种偶然没能去成，仍然会过得开心。
记住，从现在开始，多想想你拥有的，而不是你想要的。如果你这样做，你的生活就会比以前更美好，那种感受或许将是你生命中的第一次，你将会懂得心满意足的含义。
pervasive [p:'veisiv] adj. 普遍的；蔓延的；渗透的
In Western culture today one of the most pervasive beliefs is
belief in the existence of God.
在当代西方文化中，最普遍的信仰之一是相信上帝的存在。
guarantee [,g鎟n'ti:] v. 保证；担保
This contract guarantees us against damage by fire or flood.
该合同保证我们不因为火灾或水灾而受到损失。
circumstance ['s:kmstns] n. 环境；状况；事件
He was forced to do this by the circumstances.
他做此事是为环境所迫。
spouse [spauz] n. 配偶
What is the best way to keep your spouse happy in the marriage?
在婚姻中，保持配偶幸福的最好方法是什么？
专注于我们想得到的，而不是我们所拥有的，这是我见过的一种最具普遍性和破坏性的心理趋向。
如果我们一味地渴求新的欲望，将无法找到幸福。
记住，从现在开始，多想想你拥有的，而不是你想要的。如果你这样做，你的生活就会比以前更美好。
Think of how much fun you have had close to home.
close to：接近于；在附近
Take a breath and remember all that you have to be grateful.
take a breath：深呼吸；深深地吸一口气；吸口气
成功是过程，而不是终点
Success Is a Journey, Not a Destination
泰勒·布林克曼 / Tyler Brinkmann
It is very important to have a law of life to base your life on. A law of life that means a lot to me is; Success is a journey, not a destination. It means that what matters is not necessarily where you are at the end, but what you accomplish while you are trying along the way. It means that no matter what, as long as you try, you can never fail. It means you can learn from your mistakes and continue on the next journey a little wiser.
One person I believe that shares my law of life is Mark McGwire. He didn' t get caught up in the home-run chase in the 1998 season, but instead played every game in the best way he could. And, most of the time, he helped his team. He didn' t just go out there and hit home runs because he wanted to be ahead in the end, but because he wanted to make it a good season for his teammates and him.
I also think the l999-2000 St. Louis Rams as a whole are utilizing my law of life. They play every game with their full potential instead of letting a few winning games go to their heads. They stay focused on playing in the Super Bowl. They know that even if they don' t go all the way, they still will be successful because they have had a good journey. Even though they lost some games, they didn' t give up.
It does not matter if you do not have the ability to be on top in the end, to win the championship; all that matters is that you worked hard the whole time. There are a few people in the world who already understand what it means. They understand that success is a journey, not a destination. But wouldn' t it be a much better world if everyone did, if everyone would realize that someone will win and someone will lose, but what' s important is that both sides need to try their best? After all, it' s not who wins or loses, but how well you play the game, and I hope I have applied this in my own life.
生活中有“人生法则”做基础是极其重要的，给我带来极大影响的一条“人生法则”就是：成功是过程，不是终点。它意味着重要的不是你最终到达哪里，而是你在这一旅程中努力做了些什么；意味着不管你做了什么，只要努力了，就一定不会失败；还意味着你能从错误中吸取经验教训，以便更好地继续下一段旅程。
我相信一定会有一个人同意我的“人生法则”，那就是马克·麦戈维尔。在1998年的赛季中，他虽然没有打完全场，但每一场球赛他都竭尽全力了，并且大多数时间他都在帮助队友们。他并非一心为了取胜才去参加比赛，只是因为他希望这个赛季能够成为自己和队友们的一个好的赛季。
与此同时，我认为在1999—2000年比赛期间，圣路易·拉姆斯在整体上也遵循了我的“人生法则”。他们在每一场比赛中都充分发挥，而不是赢了几场比赛就被胜利冲昏了头脑。他们在超级杯比赛时全力以赴。他们明白即使不能走完全程，他们也是成功的，因为他们经历了一个精彩的过程。尽管输了几场球赛，但他们从未放弃。
