Well,I should have to make the best of it.Whether this conclusion brought on a mood of reaction,I am unable to say.I was still annoyed by what seemed to the masculine mind a senseless and dramatic performance on Maude's part,an incomprehensible case of "nerves."Nevertheless,there stole into my mind many recollections of Maude's affection,many passages between us;and my eye chanced to fall on the ink-well she had bought me out of the allowance I gave her.An unanticipated pity welled up within me for her loneliness,her despair in that room upstairs.Igot up--and hesitated.A counteracting,inhibiting wave passed through me.I hardened.I began to walk up and down,a prey to conflicting impulses.Something whispered,"go to her";another voice added,"for your own peace of mind,at any rate."I rejected the intrusion of this motive as unworthy,turned out the light and groped my way upstairs.The big clock in the hall struck twelve.
I listened outside the door of the bedroom,but all was silent within.Iknocked.
"Maude!"I said,in a low voice.
There was no response.
"Maude--let me in!I didn't mean to be unkind--I'm sorry."After an interval I heard her say:"I'd rather stay here,--to-night."But at length,after more entreaty and self-abasement on my part,she opened the door.The room was dark.We sat down together on the window-seat,and all at once she relaxed and her head fell on my shoulder,and she began weeping again.I held her,the alternating moods still running through me.
"Hugh,"she said at length,"how could you be so cruel?when you know Ilove you and would do anything for you.""I didn't mean to be cruel,Maude,"I answered.
"I know you didn't.But at times you seem so--indifferent,and you can't understand how it hurts.I haven't anybody but you,now,and it's in your power to make me happy or--or miserable."Later on I tried to explain my point of view,to justify myself.
"All I mean,"I concluded at length,"is that my position is a little different from Perry's and Tom's.They can afford to isolate themselves,but I'm thrown professionally with the men who are building up this city.
Some of them,like Ralph Hambleton and Mr.Ogilvy,I've known all my life.Life isn't so ****** for us,Maude--we can't ignore the social side.""I understand,"she said contentedly."You are more of a man of affairs --much more than Tom or Perry,and you have greater responsibilities and wider interests.I'm really very proud of you.Only--don't you think you are a little too sensitive about yourself,when you are teased?"I let this pass....
I give a paragraph from a possible biography of Hugh Paret which,as then seemed not improbable,might in the future have been written by some aspiring young worshipper of success.
"On his return from a brief but delightful honeymoon in England Mr.Paret took up again,with characteristic vigour,the practice of the law.He was entering upon the prime years of manhood;golden opportunities confronted him as,indeed,they confronted other men--but Paret had the foresight to take advantage of them.And his training under Theodore Watling was now to produce results....The reputations had already been made of some of that remarkable group of financial geniuses who were chiefly instrumental in bringing about the industrial evolution begun after the Civil War:at the same time,as is well known,a political leadership developed that gave proof of a deplorable blindness to the logical necessity of combinations in business.The lawyer with initiative and brains became an indispensable factor,"etc.,etc.
The biography might have gone on to relate my association with and important services to Adolf Scherer in connection with his constructive dream.Shortly after my return from abroad,in answer to his summons,Ifound him at Heinrich's,his napkin tucked into his shirt front,and a dish of his favourite sausages before him.
"So,the honeymoon is over!"he said,and pressed my hand."You are right to come back to business,and after awhile you can have another honeymoon,eh?I have had many since I married.And how long do you think was my first?A day!I was a foreman then,and the wedding was at six o'clock in the morning.We went into the country,the wife and I."He laid down his knife and fork,possessed by the memory."I have grown rich since,and we've been to Europe and back to Germany,and travelled on the best ships and stayed at the best hotels,but I never enjoyed a holiday more than that day.It wasn't long afterwards I went to Mr.
Durrett and told him how he could save much money.He was always ready to listen,Mr.Durrett,when an employee had anything to say.He was a big man,--an iron-master.Ah,he would be astonished if only he could wake up now!""He would not only have to be an iron-master,"I agreed,"but a financier and a railroad man to boot.""A jack of all trades,"laughed Mr.Scherer."That's what we are--men in my position.Well,it was comparatively ****** then,when we had no Sherman law and crazy statutes,such as some of the states are passing,to bother us.What has got into the politicians,that they are indulging in such foolishness?"he exclaimed,more warmly."We try to build up a trade for this country,and they're doing their best to tie our hands and tear it down.When I was in Washington the other day I was talking with one of those Western senators whose state has passed those laws.He said to me,`Mr.Scherer,I've been ****** a study of the Boyne Iron Works.
