"At last, near midnight, I heard the wop, wop, wop, of Stalky's Martinis across the valley, and some general cursing among the Malo'ts, whose main body was hid from us by a fold in the hillside. Stalky was brownin' 'em at a great rate, and very naturally they turned half right and began to blaze at their faithless allies, the Khye-Kheens--regular volley firin'. In less than ten minutes after Stalky opened the diversion they were going it hammer and tongs, both sides the valley. When we could see, the valley was rather a mixed-up affair. The Khye-Kheens had streamed out of their sungars above the gorge to chastise the Malo'ts, and Stalky--I was watching him through my glasses--had slipped in behind 'em. Very good. The Khye-Kheens had to leg it along the hillside up to where the gorge got shallow and they could cross over to the Malo'ts, who were awfully cheered to see the Khye-Kheens taken in the rear.
"Then it occurred to me to comfort the Khye-Kheens. So I turned out the whole command, and we advanced _a'_la_pas_de_charge_, doublin' up what, for the sake of argument, we'll call the Malo'ts' left flank. Even then, if they'd sunk their differences, they could have eaten us alive; but they'd been firin' at each other half the night, and they went on firin'. Queerest thing you ever saw in your born days! As soon as our men doubled up to the Malo'ts, they'd blaze at the Khye-Kheens more zealously than ever, to show they were on our side, run up the valley a few hundred yards, and halt to fire again. The moment Stalky saw our game he duplicated it his side the gorge; and, by Jove! the Khye-Kheens did just the same thing.""Yes, but," said Tertius, "you've forgot him playin' 'Arrah, Patsy, mind the baby'
on the bugle to hurry us up."
"Did he?" roared McTurk. Somehow we all began to sing it, and there was an interruption.
"Rather," said Tertius, when we were quiet. No one of the Aladdin company could forget that tune. "Yes, he played 'Patsy.' Go on, ****.""Finally," said **** Four, "we drove both mobs into each other's arms on a bit of level ground at the head of tbe valley, and saw the whole crew whirl off, fightin'
and stabbin' and swearin' in a blindin' snow-storm. They were a heavy, hairy lot, and we didn't follow 'em.
"Stalky had captured one prisoner--an old pensioned Sepoy of twenty-five years'
service, who produced his discharge--an awf'ly sportin' old card. He had been tryin'
to make his men rush us early in the day. He was sulky--angry with his own side for their cowardice, and Rutton Singh wanted to bayonet him--Sikhs don't understand fightin' against the Government after you've served it honestly--but Stalky rescued him, and froze on to him tight--with ulterior motives, I believe. When we got back to the fort, we buried young Everett--Stalky wouldn't hear of blowin' up the place--and bunked. We'd only lost ten men, all told.""Only ten, out of seventy. How did you lose 'em?" I asked.
"Oh, there was a rush on the fort early in the night, and a few Malo'ts got over the gate. It was rather a tight thing for a minute or two, but the recruits took it beautifully. Lucky job we hadn't any badly wounded men to carry, because we had forty miles to Macnamara's camp. By Jove, how we legged it! Half way in, old Rutton Singh collapsed, so we slung him across four rifles and Stalky's overcoat; and Stalky, his prisoner, and a couple of Sikhs were his bearers. After that I went to sleep. You can, you know, on the march, when your legs get properly numbed. Mac swears we all marched into his camp snoring and dropped where we halted. His men lugged us into the tents like gram-bags. I remember wakin' up and seeing Stalky asleep with his head on old Rutton Singh's chest. _He_ slept twenty-four hours. Ionly slept seventeen, but then I was coming down with dysentery.""Coming down? What rot! He had it on him before we joined Stalky in the fort," said Tertius.
"Well, _you_ needn't talk! You hove your sword at Macnamara and demanded a drumhead court-martial every time you saw him. The only thing that soothed you was putting you under arrest every half hour. You were off your head for three days.""Don't remember a word of it," said Tertius, placidly. "I remember my orderly giving me milk, though.""How did Stalky come out?" McTurk demanded, purling hard over his pipe.
"Stalky? Like a serene Brahmini bull. Poor old Mac was at his Royal Engineers' wits'