登陆注册
27877900000101

第101章 圣彼德的问题

Three men,a doctor,an accountant and a lawyer are dead and they appear in front of St.Peter.St.Peter tells them that they have to answer one question in order to get to Heaven.He looks at the doctor and asks,“There was a movie which was made about a ship that sank after hitting an iceberg,what was its name?”

The doctor answers,“The Titanic”and he is sent through.He then looks at the accountant and says,“How many people die in that ship?”

Fortunately the accountant had just watched the movie and he answers,“1500!”St.Peter sends him through and then finally turns to the lawyer and commands,in a very heavy voice,“Name them!”

有三个人死了,分别是一名医生、一名会计和一名律师。他们来到了圣彼德面前。圣彼德对他们说,如果他们想进入天堂,就得每人回答一个问题。圣彼德看着医生开始发问,“以前电影院放过一部电影,说的是一艘船撞击冰山后沉没,电影的名字是什么?”

医生回答,“《泰坦尼克号》”,医生随即被允许进入天堂。然后圣彼德看着会计说,“船上有多少人遇难?”。

会计很走运,因为他刚看过这部电影,回答道,“1500人遇难。”圣彼德把会计也放进天堂了。最后,圣彼德转过身,看着律师,非常严肃地用命令的口吻问道,“把1500人的名字都说出来?”

1.accountant n.会计师;会计人员

E.g.She is a qualified accountant.

她是一位合格的会计。

2.iceberg n.冰山;显露部分

E.g.Only the tip of iceberg poped out of water.

只有冰山的尖端突出于水面。

3.Fortunately adv.幸运地

E.g.Fortunately,I made a right decision to come to the GAC center.

我庆幸我做了正确的决定,那就是来到GAC预科中心。

自我测验22:

1.I heard someone a revolutionary song when the school was over yesterday afternoon.

A.singB.sangC.is singingD.sung

2.Peter's father will not let his little boy TV every evening.

A.watchingB.watchC.watchesD.to watch

3.That building is our library.

A.being repairedB.repairingC.having repairedD.repairs

4.You help you,you only have to ask me.

A.want me toB.want that I

C.want I shouldD.are wanting me to

5.Snow was falling when they went along a mountain path to the front.

A.to leadB.ledC.leadingD.being led

6.The driver has been trying the car for nearly an hour.

A.startB.startedC.to startD.for start

7.The boy was seen on the sportsground.

A.to playB.playC.playedD.to be playing

8.She's going to the photographer's.

A.to take her photograph

B.to have taken her photograph

C.to have her photograph taken

D.that he takes her photograph

9.Good-bye,Mr.Jones.I'm pleased.

A.to meet youB.meeting you

C.to have been meeting youD.to have met you

10.We are both looking forward to next week.

A.going on vacationB.go on vacation

C.be going on vacationD.have gone on vacation

key:1-56-10

原始目录

001.Bill Clinton 1

002.Questions for George Bush 1

003.Moving with the film actress 4

004.Death clocks 5

005.Hillary Clinton's hometown 6

006.I do so purely by choice 8

007.White Meat 9

008.Nationalization 10

009.Calvin Coolidge-A Man of Few Words 11

010.He was against it 11

011.buying the TV 14

012.George W.Bush meets Moses 16

013.The Cruises had a fight 18

014.Mototov The Follower 19

015 ironing phone call 21

016.Churchill and Twain 23

017.Madonna,Britney and Christina 25

018.Jack Kennedy-Buying An Election 27

019.Didn't sell the car 28

020.Ben Affleck&Jennifer Aniston are neighbors 31

021.Clint Eastwood-The Kind Man 32

022.How President's Relax 33

023.Paris Hilton turns to kidnapping 35

024.George Washington and the Cherry Tree 37

025.Theodore Roosvelt-On Being a Republican 39

026.Paris is overweight 40

027.Theodore Roosvelt-On Exercise 42

028.Paris Hilton-horse back riding 43

029.Washington DC Newsflash 45

030.Paris Hilton takes her finals 47

031.Rumsfeld's daily briefing 48

032.Pamela Anderson-Hurt all over 51

033.How politicians lie 52

034.Paris Hilton prays for help from God 54

035.Clinton buys pigs 55

036.silent relationship-Tom Cruise&Katie Holmes 56

037.Cameron Diaz on her changing Zip codes 58

038.Clinton The Story Teller 60

039.Sarah Jessica Parker-Corpse——like look on her Face 60

040.French joke“we are going at night”61

041.Sarah Jessica Parker borrows a horrible book 63

042.bill Clinton drowning 64

043.Eva Longoria——locked keys inside her car 66

044.change is coming 67

045.Two actors met 68

046.Eva Longoria&Terry Hatcher-Redecorating her bedroom 69

047.General Patton 71

048 like father,like son 72

049.Napoleon was ill 72

050.Lindsay Lohan&Paris Hilton Bet 75

051.who is George Washington?77

052.Following Suit 78

053.“The President is we tall did.”79

054.Harry Truman-On Becoming a President 81

055.She will order for herself 82

056.obama fans in school 84

057.the president 85

058.The train is not moving 87

059.I'm just glad to hear it 89

060.PEOPLE ARE STUPID 91

061.The Emperor Of Russia 92

062.Al Gore 93

063.They opened their eyes 96

064.George Bush went jogging 97

065.Bill gates and god 99

066.beckham visits a school 102

067.Sleeping Beauty,Tom Thumb and Don Juan 106

068.Having an affair with a horse-Donald Trump 108

069.Albert Einstein and the New Zealand economist 109

070.The Greats Don't Need Hair Cuts 111

071.Bill Gates in Heaven 113

072.oprah's room 116

073.A spider in the paper 118

074.He prefers 119

075.But I must find it 121

076.Mark Twain 122

077.He has been deaf for years 126

078.The faithful wife 129

079.mermaid 130

008.who gets the bill?131

081.subway series 133

082.Seven-up 135

083.naming 137

084.Pope and Queen Elizabeth 139

085.THE WALL 141

086.Psychiatrist 144

087.Goethe's Tolerance 145

088.A Life for a Life 147

089.How do you start a flood?149

090.Dumas 150

091.Johnny's Letter to Baby Jesus 151

092.The Barber 154

093.What Is a Gentleman?155

094.Food and Music 157

095.A Strange Creature 158

096.Why did the chicken cross the road?(1)159

097.Why did the chicken cross the road?(2)161

098.Columbus'telephone number 162

098.MOSES&JESUS 162

099.St Peter's Question 164

同类推荐
  • Rose O' the River

    Rose O' the River

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流
  • 那些美轮美奂的舞台剧

    那些美轮美奂的舞台剧

    《每天读一点英文:那些美轮美奂的舞台剧(英汉对照)》收录了莎士比亚、萧伯纳、谢里丹等文学泰斗的经典戏剧。让你在感受舞台磅礴气势的同时,学会戏里戏外做人的道理!
  • 地道英语脱口而出

    地道英语脱口而出

    本书精选热点单词及句型,用口语交流最热点的主题。本书内容丰富,语言地道。书中附有配套超长600分钟MP3的下载二维码,只需拿起手机扫一扫即可轻松下载MP3,随时随地练习听力和口语,开创外语学习新模式!
  • AmericaandAmericans

    AmericaandAmericans

    从1998年以来赵启正发表的演讲和访谈中精选出几篇编辑成册,这些文章以公共外交和跨文化交流为主题,有的是向世界说明中国的经典案例,有的是对中外交流的精辟阐述,有的是与国外知名人士的智慧交锋,充分展示了赵启正作为中国新一代政府新闻发言人所具有的激情与才识,以及他特有的坦率、开放的态度。
  • 双语学习丛书-人生之道

    双语学习丛书-人生之道

    流淌心灵的隽语,记忆的箴言,在双语的世界里,感受英语学习的乐趣,体会英语学习的奥妙,提高英语学习的能力!丛书包括:爱的交融、财富精英、成长课堂、醇香母爱、父爱如山、故乡情怀、节日趣闻、快乐心语、浪漫往昔等故事。
热门推荐
  • 金刚场陀罗尼经

    金刚场陀罗尼经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 兽人美食街

    兽人美食街

    经历过末世的陈圆圆被一颗流星砸到兽人位面,没想到‘流星’竟是系统。从此身携美食系统干出了一番美食行的大事业。哦,顺带收服了一位吃货老公。亲(づ ̄3 ̄)づ╭?~,要来串烤肉不?本文暴力吃货女x面瘫闷骚男。简介无能求推荐评论还有票票谢啦!!☆⌒(*^-゜)v
  • 天行

    天行

    号称“北辰骑神”的天才玩家以自创的“牧马冲锋流”战术击败了国服第一弓手北冥雪,被誉为天纵战榜第一骑士的他,却受到小人排挤,最终离开了效力已久的银狐俱乐部。是沉沦,还是再次崛起?恰逢其时,月恒集团第四款游戏“天行”正式上线,虚拟世界再起风云!
  • 遇见杨先生的医千零一夜

    遇见杨先生的医千零一夜

    医生文,医患+师徒。三年前,杨先生还是个小主治,上有院长压力,下有病患医闹,谨小慎微的在夹缝中生存。那时候,苏小姐是他最特殊的小病号。三年后,杨先生已经成为病区主管,硕士生导师,凭借一张帅脸和臭得不得了的脾气,在精神一科横行霸道。这时候,苏小姐成了他最神秘的小徒弟。……苏予,一个本科念了师范大学中文系的小丫头。你问她为什么会穿上这身白大褂?她会朝你甜甜一笑,然后回答:“因为我家杨医生呀!”
  • 追月亮的女孩

    追月亮的女孩

    母亲过世后,17岁的埃米莉只身前往北卡罗来纳州的神奇小镇穆拉比,投靠从未谋面的外公。不曾想到,整个小镇就像是个魔幻的世外桃源,不可思议的事情在这里一再发生,一道道神秘的白色光芒在每个夜晚都徘徊在埃米莉窗前……镇上的人们对此闭口不言,只有初来乍到的埃米莉感到不可思议。埃米莉准备一探究竟,却惊奇地发现,这一切竟然都和她有着千丝万缕的关系,一个名叫温·科菲的男孩在这时主动走进了她的生活。宿命般的相遇,让两人越走越近。但她不知道的是,两人的家族纠葛其实正是这座小镇秘密的开端。
  • 人间鲁迅

    人间鲁迅

    林贤治,诗人,学者。广东阳江人。著有诗集《骆驼和星》、《梦想或忧伤》;散文随笔集《平民的信使》、《旷代的忧伤》;评论集《胡风集团案:20世纪中国的政治事件和精神事件》、《守夜者札记》、《时代与文学的肖像》、《自制的海图》、《午夜的幽光》、《五四之魂》、《纸上的声音》;自选集《娜拉:出走或归来势》、《沉思与反抗》;传记《人间鲁迅》、《鲁迅的最后十年》、《漂泊者萧红》等。主编丛书丛刊多种。
  • 你是我最美丽的秘密

    你是我最美丽的秘密

    无名小画家汪真真被逼卖保险,一次同学会让她重遇高中同桌朱仲谦,彼时他减肥成功变身高富帅男神,而她一贫如洗肥胖臃肿,堪称屌丝中的战斗机。她只想把保险卖给他,而他……只想她喜欢他。她死都不信他喜欢她,而他……死都不肯告诉她,他爱她的心从未被时间改变。这世间幸福的事,是在最好的年华,遇到一个可以让你任性的男人,而比这更幸福的是,时间匆匆,你转过头,那个人还在那里,他要把最好的自己送给你。
  • 宇宙超进化

    宇宙超进化

    原本一片宁静的宇宙!在某一天因为一个十二级顶级科技文明的掠夺者和追逐掠夺者的执行者在太阳系激战了起来。而在遥远的地球只感觉一阵光芒就陷入了无尽的冰冷和黑暗!原来是因为掠夺者被执行者追逐了将近200年里因为一直逃串能源不足,而太阳系里只有太阳这颗恒星才能补充。而在这场大战中一颗散发着微弱光芒的球体向着地球的方向以每秒数百光年的速度飞去,故事就此开始!可能文笔不太好,见谅!
  • 天行

    天行

    号称“北辰骑神”的天才玩家以自创的“牧马冲锋流”战术击败了国服第一弓手北冥雪,被誉为天纵战榜第一骑士的他,却受到小人排挤,最终离开了效力已久的银狐俱乐部。是沉沦,还是再次崛起?恰逢其时,月恒集团第四款游戏“天行”正式上线,虚拟世界再起风云!
  • 万界永帝

    万界永帝

    一个落魄的异界重生者,偶然得到了一柄万道冥空剑,凭借这柄宝剑,他竟能随心所欲的创造天地万物!丹药、战甲、神兵、坐骑、美女、皇城府邸、九天宫阙……他全都能造;什么炼丹师、炼器师、铭文师、术炼师、灵匠师……他全都包了!手持诛仙战剑、肩扛开天巨斧!坐拥亿万神魔、踏上至高帝座!其实,从得到万道冥空剑的那一刻起,他就注定了,一定会得到整个世界……