At the mention of that one word, she suddenly cried out loud, as insome sharp agony. It seemed as if the thought of him upset all hercomposure, destroyed the calm, overcame the exhaustion. Wildpassionate cry succeeded to cry--"Frederick! Frederick! Come to me. Iam dying. Little first-born child, come to me once again!"
She was in violent hysterics. Margaret went and called Dixon in terror.
Dixon came in a huff, and accused Margaret of having over-excited hermother. Margaret bore all meekly, only trusting that her father mightnot return. In spite of her alarm, which was even greater than theoccasion warranted, she obeyed all Dixon"s directions promptly andwell, without a word of self-justification. By so doing she mollified heraccuser. They put her mother to bed, and Margaret sate by her till shefell asleep, and afterwards till Dixon beckoned her out of the room, and,with a sour face, as if doing something against the grain, she bade herdrink a cup of coffee which she had prepared for her in the drawing-room, and stood over her in a commanding attitude as she did so.
"You shouldn"t have been so curious, Miss, and then you wouldn"t haveneeded to fret before your time. It would have come soon enough. Andnow, I suppose, you"ll tell master, and a pretty household I shall have ofyou!"
"No, Dixon," said Margaret, sorrowfully, "I will not tell papa. He couldnot bear it as I can." And by way of proving how well she bore it, sheburst into tears.
"Ay! I knew how it would be. Now you"ll waken your mamma, just aftershe"s gone to sleep so quietly. Miss Margaret my dear, I"ve had to keepit down this many a week; and though I don"t pretend I can love her asyou do, yet I loved her better than any other man, woman, or child--noone but Master Frederick ever came near her in my mind. Ever sinceLady Beresford"s maid first took me in to see her dressed out in whitecrape, and corn-ears, and scarlet poppies, and I ran a needle down intomy finger, and broke it in, and she tore up her worked pocket-handkerchief, after they"d cut it out, and came in to wet the bandagesagain with lotion when she returned from the ball--where she"d been theprettiest young lady of all--I"ve never loved any one like her. I littlethought then that I should live to see her brought so low. I don"t meanno reproach to nobody. Many a one calls you pretty and handsome, andwhat not. Even in this smoky place, enough to blind one"s eyes, the owlscan see that. But you"ll never be like your mother for beauty--never; notif you live to be a hundred."
"Mamma is very pretty still. Poor mamma!"
"Now don"t ye set off again, or I shall give way at last" (whimpering).
"You"ll never stand master"s coming home, and questioning, at this rate.
Go out and take a walk, and come in something like. Many"s the timeI"ve longed to walk it off--the thought of what was the matter with her,and how it must all end."
"Oh, Dixon!" said Margaret, "how often I"ve been cross with you, notknowing what a terrible secret you had to bear!"
"Bless you, child! I like to see you showing a bit of a spirit. It"s the goodold Beresford blood. Why, the last Sir John but two shot his stewarddown, there where he stood, for just telling him that he"d racked thetenants, and he"d racked the tenants till he could get no more money offthem than he could get skin off a flint."
"Well, Dixon, I won"t shoot you, and I"ll try not to be cross again."
"You never have. If I"ve said it at times, it has always been to myself,just in private, by way of making a little agreeable conversation, forthere"s no one here fit to talk to. And when you fire up, you"re the veryimage of Master Frederick. I could find in my heart to put you in apassion any day, just to see his stormy look coming like a great cloudover your face. But now you go out, Miss. I"ll watch over missus; and asfor master, his books are company enough for him, if he should comein."
"I will go," said Margaret. She hung about Dixon for a minute or so, as ifafraid and irresolute; then suddenly kissing her, she went quickly out ofthe room.
"Bless her!" said Dixon. "She"s as sweet as a nut. There are three people Ilove: it"s missus, Master Frederick, and her. Just them three. That"s all.
The rest be hanged, for I don"t know what they"re in the world for.
Master was born, I suppose, for to marry missus. If I thought he lovedher properly, I might get to love him in time. But he should ha" made adeal more on her, and not been always reading, reading, thinking,thinking. See what it has brought him to! Many a one who never readsnor thinks either, gets to be Rector, and Dean, and what not; and I daresay master might, if he"d just minded missus, and let the weary readingand thinking alone.--There she goes" (looking out of the window as sheheard the front door shut). "Poor young lady! her clothes look shabby towhat they did when she came to Helstone a year ago. Then she hadn"t somuch as a darned stocking or a cleaned pair of gloves in all herwardrobe. And now--!"